Whoa, everywhere you turn people are talking and arguing about theย Confederate flag. Many want to erase it from history. Others are wrapping their bodies in it like a beloved blanket. Southern heritage means different things to different people. No matter how much ranting and protesting one way or another, people will NEVER see things exactly the same way.
Youย probably knew it was only a matter of time before I had to throw my two cents in about southern heritage. After all, myย blog includesย grits in the title for heaven’s sake. Southern? Why yes I am.
But the Confederate flag is not a symbol of my southern heritage.
My southern heritage includesย the people and places and family traditions that shaped me.
This land at our home place, once swampy and snaky, land that my grandparents and great-grandparentsย cleared, this is my southern heritage.
Land rich in history.
This is the placeย I return home to as often as possibleโthe place I can breathe and remember and just be.
This field was (is) my playground.
My sister and I spent countless hours zooming ourย Matchbox cars between the furrows of cotton that by August grew thick and high above ourย heads. Weย hunted for tadpoles and turtles in the ditches and made mudpies on steamy summer days. We rode our John Deere bicycles to the far edge of the property where the earthย seemed to curve. We chopped cotton with the farm hands.
My southern heritage includes priceless black and white family photos and stories passed down for generations.
A wooden box of old family recipes, the handwritten cards smeared with oily fingerprints and smudges of chocolate.
My church home filled with memories I can recallย more clearly than what I did last week.
My southern heritage includes the small Delta towns that will always be home to me, andย Old Man River which roils nearby shaping the very cultureย of this place.
The truth is, racism isnโt my story. Iโve never been denied anything because of my race. My ancestors who hailed from Tennessee and other points below the Mason-Dixon line likely fought against the abolition of slavery. They probably even owned slaves. Although Iโve never researched my ancestry, I doubt my people sat in the back of the bus. So who am I to say the rebel flag isnโt racist to those whose ancestors were slaves?
I am reminded of the wise words of Atticus Finch in Harper Leeโs iconic book To Kill a Mockingbird. “If you can learn a simple trick, Scout, you’ll get along a lot better with all kinds of folks. You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view [โฆ] until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.”
Since we canโt literally climb into someoneโs skin, maybe all we can hope for is tolerance. As a society we’d do well to remember that everyoneโs story is different and worthy of consideration. Even those completely unlikeย our own.
Maybe it’s wishful thinking on my part, but I gottaย believe that down deep where we all live, we are more alike than not.
Grace Grits and Gardening
Farm. Food. Garden. Life.
[tweetthis]My #Southern #Heritage is #Delta farm land. @ArFB @ArWomenBloggers @farmpress[/tweetthis]
Musical Pairing:
American Kids, Kenny Chesney
Colene says
Great post!
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thanks Colene.
Patricia Rodgers says
Just wanted to say that your words make a lot of sense and I understand exactly what you said! Thank you for your open mindedness!
Colene says
Great reply. I tried to think of something that brilliant to say, but you did it for me.
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thank you Patricia.
Kip says
Great post! I think we are all the sum total of many parts. That flag does represent a bit of Southern pride to some and a boot in on the back to some others.
Talya Tate Boerner says
Yes, thanks Kip. Good to hear from you!
Gary says
Well said!
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thanks Gary!
gina says
I love your post, Talya. But, I don’t like the word tolerance. I don’t want to tolerate something. I want to…I can’t think of the word, or maybe there isn’t a word yet. Understand? Accept? Why can’t people just accept and not just tolerate?
Talya Tate Boerner says
Maybe tolerate isn’t a good word. Maybe empathy? Or compassion. I don’t know. Hard to put into words…Thanks Gina!
Barbara Tate says
Well said. Loved the post and the pictures. I especially like the one of Mother with her gun. The video fit perfectly. Have always liked it.
Robin says
Well said! What happen to consideration for others? In our fast paced life no one ever seems to show consideration for others.
Linda Beason says
Good thoughts , good words , great pictures . Most of the things I did myself . Compassion brings it together ! Thanks
Mark Price says
My thoughts exactly. You express yourself well.
june walker says
Very well said, Talya…..you are always so thoughtful with your words. I am the first generation in my family that were not farmers, they migrated from North Carolina, to Tennessee then to Arkansas, down to Louisiana then to East Texas and I have done a genealogy dating back to 1611 to this day……in all the photos, stories never was a confederate flag seen or even spoken of….it’s really a small part of our history considering the length of time we have been a nation. Sorry this is so long but your post really got me going….keep on with your wonderful writing, I am so proud of all you are doing.
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Cindy Lu says
Well said and I believe that word is definitely EMPATHY. Loved it!
Talya’s cuz
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thanks Cindy Lu!
Lou Nell McCraw Davis says
That is GREAT Talya!! The writing and the viewpoint!
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thank you Lou Nell! I appreciate your comment.
Dorothy Johnson says
Wow! This is one of your best posts. Loved it1
Talya Tate Boerner says
Thanks Dorothy:) I appreciate it.
Barbara Tate says
This is one of my favorites.