Although I never walked ten miles to school barefoot in the snow, I did grow up on a farm with a septic tank. When it rained, sewer water stood the backyard underneath my bedroom window. And the rusty well water sometimes turned my hair orange like a bad home dye job.

Any time thunder rolled across the county, the electricity went out. Sometimes we were in the dark for days.

And, we had a party line…

***

Sunday morning, after sleeping through menopausal night sweats, I awoke to a full head of sticky Shirley Temple curls bordering on dreadlocks. After avoiding my reflection in the mirror, I quickly jumped in the shower only to find I had NO WATER.

Panic mode.

Clearly, I’ve grown soft.

Quickly I checked to confirm I had paid my water bill. Whew! I posted a lifeline to my neighbors on the Munger Place Facebook page, was anyone else having this problem? (Apparently  not.) The dogs stared at me (my hair?) begging to go for a walk. No way. Not with this hair.

Then I remembered I received a dry shampoo sample in my Birchbox just yesterday. What timing!

I sprayed the stuff on my head as instructed, waited the allotted time, brushed it out and ended up with bushy gummy gray-ish helmet head that smelled of talcum powder and cheap air freshener. Way nastier than before. I wondered if the swimming pool had warmed up yet…

Throwing on a winter hat, I pulled it down to my ears, thankful the morning was blustery and chilly. After I walked Lucy and Annabelle, I discovered I did have cold water (no hot) downstairs and in the guest bathroom upstairs, but still no water at all in the master. Hanging my head over the clawfoot tub, I washed my gooey hair in icy water while the dogs hid thinking a bath was imminent.

Why does this stuff happen when my husband is out of town?

I’ve grown soft.

talya

p.s.

Riddle me this all you handymen/women out there…

How is it possible to have no water whatsoever (hot or cold) in one upstairs bathroom, yet have cold water in the other baths and kitchen? I’m no plumber, but this doesn’t make sense to me.

The next day, the water miraculously decided to work, hot and cold, in all the appropriate places…

Musical Pairing: