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Archives for 2012

Where the Sidewalk Ends

May 11, 2012 By Talya Tate Boerner

Once there was a tree. . .

I love trees. I would hate to live in a place with no trees. I couldn’t breathe or think or sleep at night. I imagine it would be like living in a very high altitude spot where the oxygen is thin. The huge trees in our corner of Dallas are one of the best things about Munger Place. The trees and the porches, of course. They kinda go hand in hand.
My good friend Harry Gibson has one of the best trees and porches in Munger Place. Both are rich with history and provide shade from the Texas heat. And both selflessly give something to all who take the time to slow down and enjoy, whether it’s for a glass of wine on the swing, a chat on the old wooden pew beside the front door, or a peaceful stroll underneath his 100+ year old gnarly Vitek tree, currently loaded with aromatic purple blooms.
This amazing tree is the gateway to Harry’s porch. Twinkle lights underneath the canopy light the sidewalk in the night making his house seem like a constant gathering spot, which it is. He adjusts the lights from time to time, making sure the strands are positioned and working properly, trimming branches when the city insists the limbs are too low. Never would he think of cutting it down. Not even if he needed wood “to make a boat to sail away and be happy”.
The view from Harry’s Porch
Lucy and Annabelle and I walk underneath Harry’s tree several times a day, always stopping to sniff and look at the branches that form a natural arbor. (They sniff, I look.) And straining on their leashes, the dogs always make a bee-line for Harry’s porch, where the water in his old birdbath is their favorite watering hole on a blazing hot day. In the afternoons, his porch is often overrun with friends – both the two legged and four legged variety. Sometimes we stop and sit even when Harry isn’t outside. You can always find what you need there.
Clyde

Clyde, his adorable grandson, often plays around that tree, with his Tonka trucks and sidewalk chalk, while neighbors discuss Munger happenings and news. Harry regales everyone with stories from his past whether as a young man working in the union business, or the time he awoke to find a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader in his bed, or simply the details of his prior day’s lunch. He is a great cook at 81 years old. And he’s in good health, which he attributes to good bourbon on the porch with good ‘acquaintances’ near his favorite tree.

And the tree is happy.

talya

Musical Pairings:

George Strait, “Where the Sidewalk Ends”
Randy Newman, “You’ve Got a Friend in Me”

“And the tree was happy.” The Giving Tree, Shel Silverstein

Harry and Clyde

Do these lip enhancements make my butt look smaller??

May 10, 2012 By Talya Tate Boerner

Why on earth do women plump up their lips larger than their noses? Does anyone think it looks natural or youthful? Against my better judgment I went to the mall to buy my favorite body lotion. In and out. Ten minutes max.
The parking lot was packed like Black Friday, mid-week, mid-day. The Dallas economy is booming. I really like this lotion.
One-third of the women I walked passed had enormous fake Angelina lips. Why? Was there a tracker-jacker nest within Northpark? Dallas must be the inflated lip capitol of the world, next to LA. In 10 days, I saw no one in Fayetteville sporting this craziness. (In fairness, I only visited Sherwin Williams, Sonic and Home Depot…) In Dallas, I see 10 people in 10 minutes with this obsession. But these lips can be spotted at the Dallas Home Depot and Sherwin Williams I feel certain.

This looks about as natural to me as those Dancing with the Stars spray on tans.

Men, are these lips luscious and kissable? Or scary?

Do engorged lips look young when the rest of your body is 50+? Do lip injections lead to turkey neck surgery down the road? I just don’t get it.

talya

Musical Pairings:

Adam Ant, “Plastic Surgery”
Sixpence None the Richer, “Kiss Me”

Don’t change a thing and you will go far.

May 9, 2012 By Talya Tate Boerner

May is graduation time. As graduation announcements begin to roll in, I think back to my own high school graduation. Rivercrest High School, Class of 1980. Just yesterday to me. As a high school senior, the last looooonnng year drags and anticipation builds up to that all important moment when you walk across the stage to receive your much deserved diploma, trying to smile for the camera while balancing that ill-fitting mortarboard hat.
I remember thinking that hat was going to fall off my head, plus it was squishing my carefully feathered bangs totally flattening my hair which I had curled loosely on hot rollers. It was rocking the Farrah ‘do when I left the house until Mrs. Meadows adjusted it, securing it to my skull with bobby pins. Just give me my diploma so I can start my life, please.
Yesterday, with my life in full swing, I attempted to make a dent in our disorganized garage. In the bottom of a storage crate, I ran across my senior year Memories book. And that was the end of my garage cleaning project. Wiping the cover clean of dust bunnies, I immediately plopped down on the dirty floor of the garage to relive a bit of 1980. 

Apparently I was a big time scrapbooker before scrapbooking was in vogue as every single page of the book was completely filled with thoughts, pictures, and newspaper and magazine clippings. Or maybe I was just bored to death. Flipping through the pages I realized I had unearthed a time capsule. It looked as if it might have been living in the bottom of a locker at Rivercrest for the past thirty-two years. Or buried in the field beside the school parking lot where my little yellow corvette accidentally threw gravel peeling out for the last time.

As I read through the pages, I was struck by how fortunate I am to still be friends with many of my classmates and teachers. 
It was the year the Rivercrest Colts beat the rival Osceola Seminoles 9-6 on November 2, 1979, at home. I know because I wrote all about it. It’s recorded in ink for all of eternity, in my handwriting, probably with a Bic pen, and backed up with a newspaper clipping of the same. Back then, before Rivercrest dominated every sport throughout the entire state of Arkansas, Osceola always beat us, SoThisWasBIG. We had a great baseball team too, also walloping the Seminoles 14-3 to win Regionals.  It still makes me happy.
Tim Hardin
It was the year my classmate Tim Allen (from Dyess not Hollywood) and I won our three-legged race during intermurals, but he received a broken arm and I got 6 stitches in my chin for our efforts. That gym floor was slick in sock feet. We were unable to compete in the final heat.

According to my anthology, Billy Joel and Pink Floyd were my favorite musical artists, and my preferred television shows were Dallas, SNL, Three’s Company (RIP John Ritter) and Dukes of Hazzard. Movies = Grease, Halloween (the original one) and The Jerk. Reflecting on this, I think these are all good choices still.

I loved Hang Ten and Chic clothing, Candies shoes and Jontue perfume. I have pictures of these logos plastered on the “Gradfad” page…And an Arkansas Razorback banner – why did I not attend the University of Arkansas?
News From Planet Earth
On the “News From Planet Earth” page, I glued headlines of the Persian Gulf Crisis, Khomeini, Teheran, the Crisis in Iran. So basically nothing has changed. There was also the headline “Did Elvis Die From Drug Abuse?” Really? Was society debating this during in 1980? Everyone knows Elvis is still alive living in Arizona… 
2 pages dedicated to the race track???
The fact that I devoted two entire pages to the horse races speaks to my obvious gambling problem. There wasn’t a “horse race page” in the book, but I surely made room including losing tickets and season guest passes and a detailed diary of the entire weekend with the Barnetts. I’m certain my comprehensive account of the events would hold up in federal court should I be required to testify for some reason. And so my journal begins with, “We left for Hot Springs on Wednesday, April 2, 1980. This was during our Easter vacation. Clyde Barnett left at 7:00 am, Daddy left at 8:10 am, Mrs. Barnett, Bob and Bill left at 3:30 and Momma, Staci, Craig and I followed after that. We had 4 vehicles up there.” According to my specifics, “Craig and I placed all our bets together, betting $66.00 and losing $69.00 by the end of day one, winning $58.20 by the end of the 3rd race on day two but losing $12.70 by day’s end. On the 3rd day in the 9th race (the Fantasy Stakes) Craig bet $5 across the board on Bold ‘n Determined, Staci bet $5 to show on Honest & True and I bet $5.00 on Satin Ribera. All 3 horses came in, and I was ahead $20 at day’s end”. SERIOUSLY!? I kept track of all this. Did my parents not realize I had a gambling problem at an early age? I was insane and destined to be a bookie but ended up a banker – a close second I suppose.
Not surprisingly, I have a list of every single graduation gift I received. Unlike the popular gift of cash or gift card for today’s grad, most people gave actual presents in 1980. Like towels or picture frames or a Cross pen set or 2 pairs of bikini panties.…Yes. 2 pairs of bikini panties from a family in Keiser who shall remain nameless. Apparently I didn’t think it was one bit odd at the time, because I proudly listed it in my book.  I wonder if this was their standard gift to all Keiser grads? Did BeckyJudyNormaAnitaCarrieMary receive this as well?  (I swear this is true. And no, it wasn’t from the Barnetts.)

Lots of classmates wrote little messages in my book. Everyone proudly signed their name with “class of 80”. It was a very good year. Next time I go home I may bury this valuable cache of historic information in front of the school by the brick wall where the Future Business Leaders take yearbook pictures. Hundreds of years from now, new emerging civilizations will discover it and wish they had it so great. And they will wonder what the hell kind of gift bikini panties were for graduation…

Happy Graduation!


talya


Musical Pairing:


Seals & Croft, “We May Never Pass This Way Again” (class song)

Excerpts of friend comments from my Memory book:


“Without you failing your test too, I could have never made it.” darla h.

“I’ll never forget the first time I saw you in biology, stuck-up, but now you are a great friend.” tim a.

“I didn’t get to know you like I wanted to know you, but what I know is good.” clay w.

“You are a great friend and a great person and very great looking with a great personality and a great singing voice.” joe a.

“We’ve had great times together and I’m sure there will be more to come.” craig b.

“Let’s keep in touch and don’t let your feet stick to the Murr Theatre.” becky p.

“Don’t change a thing and you will go far daughter.” tim h. 

Kelsey – Class of 2007
Threw hat in the air…

Tate – Class of 2011
Balancing that hat

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Hi! I'm Talya Tate Boerner. Writer, Reader, Arkansas Master Naturalist / Master Gardener, Author of

THE ACCIDENTAL SALVATION OF GRACIE LEE (2016)

GENE, EVERYWHERE: a life-changing visit from my father-in-law (2020)

BERNICE RUNS AWAY (2022)

THE THIRD ACT OF THEO GRUENE (coming 2025)

Recent Ramblings:

  • Sunday Letter: 03.29.26
  • Sunday Letter: February 22, 2026
  • Our Garden Mission Statement
  • Goodbye, 2025. Hello, 2026.
  • Sunday Letter: 11.23.25

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